


Water bottle boy

by juiceboxjellyfish



Series: A collection of Snowbaz AUs [1]
Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: AU, M/M, My water bottle wouldn't open so I threw it and it hit you, Normal AU, Normal!AU, yeah I wrote Baz's name three different ways okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-24
Updated: 2017-08-24
Packaged: 2018-12-19 12:55:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11898174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juiceboxjellyfish/pseuds/juiceboxjellyfish
Summary: "My water bottle wouldn't open so I threw it and it hit you" AUBased on a tumblr post which I wish I could credit, but I've only seen it in cropped screenshots :(If you've seen the post and know who made it, please tell me so I can credit them! It's basically a list of funny AU ideas.





	Water bottle boy

It was so hot. There wasn't a cloud to be seen in the sky, and the sunlight was burning hot. Sweat was running down my forehead and my tank top was uncomfortably sticking to my back. I wished I was wearing a darker color, but of course I had to go for bright red. You could see my sweat stains from a mile away. Curls of bronze hair where sticking to my forehead.

Here's a handy life tip: don't go running in the summer in the middle of the day.  
I was practically melting, and of course, being the genius I am, I hadn't put on any sunscreen. I felt like a hot dog on a barbecue. And now I was hungry too... Dammit.

I opened my bag and reached for my water bottle. I wished I'd brought some scones, but maybe sour cherry scones aren't the healthiest workout snack...  
I tried to open my water bottle.  
I failed.  
I tried to open my water bottle again.  
I failed again.  
I realised that my hands were very sweaty and therefore probably slippery, and proceeded to wipe them on my pants.  
I then attempted to open my water bottle another time.  
I still couldn't do it.  
Good job, me. I was getting even sweatier now and it was just so hot.  
I covered the cap with my tank top and tried to use the fabric to get a better grip.  
I still couldn't open my fucking water bottle. What the hell.  
I just wanted some fucking water! What had I ever done to deserve this? In frustration, I threw my water bottle. I swear I meant to throw it on the ground, but I guess I wasn't really focusing on aiming. My water bottle flew through the air, and it became clear that it was going to land several meters away. It soared through the air in a majestic arch until... 

"CROWLEY! Who threw that??"  
Shit. Someone stood up from a bench, aggressively closing a book. He bent down to pick up the water bottle, and then looked around to find the culprit. My face was already red from working out, but I felt even more blood rushing to my cheeks as he turned in my direction. He was tall, handsome, and angry. Very angry.  
Which, considering that I just threw a full water bottle at his head, was fair enough.  
It was pretty obvious that I was the one who threw the water bottle. Nobody else nearby could've thrown it at him from that angle. 

He had obviously also figured this out, because he was quickly walking in my direction. It was kind of terrifying.  
For a second, I considered turning around and running away, but that seemed like a bit of a dick move, and besides, I really wanted my water bottle back. 

He was standing right in front of me now. He really was tall. And frightening. He had light brown skin, sharp cheekbones and black hair. His eyebrows were furrowed and his dark grey gaze was piercing. He held up the water bottle.  
"Do you care to explain why you threw this at my head?" he asked. His tone was calm, but his voice was dripping with rage. I swallowed.  
"I didn't mean to! I swear! I wast just-" I stopped myself. How was I going to explain myself? I would just sound stupid! Who accidentally throws stuff at people's heads?  
"You were just what?" the guy asked impatiently.  
"Well, you see", I stammered, "I was trying to open it, but I kept failing, and then I... threw it. But I didn't mean to hit anyone, I swear!! I just wasn't aiming..." He raised an eyebrow.  
"You couldn't open your water bottle, so you threw it? Did you think that would help somehow?" He looked less angry now, and more judging and confused. He probably thought I was completely stupid.  
"No, I was just... mad. So I threw it" I mumbled. His facial expression softened.  
"And you're so bad at aiming that you hit me right in the head? That's almost impressive!" He was smirking now. Crowley, he really was handsome... That twit.  
I decided that I didn't like him. He was obnoxiously tall and handsome, and he was teasing me for doing something perfectly normal like throwing a water bottle in frustration. How dare he.  
I realised that I'd been standing quietly just staring at him for a while, and looked down at my feet. He chuckled quietly. Then we stood there, not saying anything.

He eventually broke the silence.  
"What's your name, water bottle boy?" I looked up.  
"'Water bottle boy'? Really? That's a stupid nickname" I replied. He laughed.  
"Well what am I supposed to call you? You threw a water bottle at me and I don't know your name" he said, and I suppose it made sense.  
"My name is Simon Snow." He smiled.  
"Nice to meet you, Simon Snow. I'm Baz Pitch." He reached out his hand for a handshake. I wiped my hand on my pants before taking it.  
Why was he doing this? I couldn't help but find it a bit suspicious. This didn't feel like the usual consequences of accidentally throwing something at somebody's head.  
I'd expected it to be more like "why the fuck did you throw a water bottle at my head? Oh it was an accident? Suuure... Here's your stupid water bottle back." 

He was probably plotting something. He seemed like the type of guy who'd plot things. Why else would he still be talking to me? And why wouldn't he just give me my water bottle back? Clearly suspicious...  
Just as I thought that, he held up the water bottle again.  
"Well" he said, "this has been nice, but I have to get going. Do you want your water bottle back or can I keep it as a memory?" He was doing that stupid smirk again. It was weirdly frustrating. Stupid handsome stranger with his stupid smirk...  
"I want it back. I was planning to drink the water."  
"Are you sure? Becuase usually when people want to drink out of a bottle, they don't throw it at a stranger's head. They open it, by unscrewing the cap. Like this." He opened the water bottle. Of-fucking-course. He couldn't just be handsome and suspiciously polite, he also had to be able to open the bottle immediately. Dickhead.  
I took the bottle and drank out of it. Crowley, I was so thirsty.  
Handy life tip 2: drink water, it's great. I emptied half the bottle and then put the cap back on.  
"Thank you" I mumbled to the guy. Baz. He smiled.  
"You're welcome" he said, and then he walked away. I stood there for a while, watching him walk away. I turned around and walked in the opposite direction.

I'd walked for about ten meters when I realised he might've done something to the water bottle. Should I really have drunk from it? I held it up to inspect it, and found a number written on the label in permanent marker.  
It looked like a phone number. Underneath it was a short message.

"Call me, water bottle boy <3"

I felt the blood rush to my cheeks and turned around, but Baz was nowhere to be seen. I just stood there for a few seconds before continuing to walk away.  
I stopped after a few meters and picked up my phone.

"You've reached Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, who is this?"  
"Water bottle boy is still a stupid nickname."  
Baz laughed, and I felt something warm forming inside me.


End file.
